CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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