And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
