And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
