Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just blew my weed a kiss
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
