Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
