You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
