But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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