i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize