I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize