just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
