i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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