i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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