Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
