But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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