Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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