I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i was born a porn star she said
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
Randomize