Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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