im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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