He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
im holly from the hills drunk
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
