i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
