Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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