i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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