I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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