think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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