he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
People in love make me want to vomit
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Randomize
