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ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
