i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
