I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
