508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
