How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
