My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
