Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
