Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
