there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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