im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Randomize
