woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize