You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
