making cat noises will not fix the situation.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize