my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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