IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
