you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
