don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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