After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
