I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
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