apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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