Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize