Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
