Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
