I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize