I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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