I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize