That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Michael Bay diarrhea
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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